What a random week it was. Between classes, relationships, summer plans, and an array of other things last week proved to be a one of change for me. “Your heart is revealed and your character forged when life does not turn out the way you planned.” This quote seems to sum up my life lately. People, including myself, often complain about how mediocre life cane be. I am discovering in huge ways that life will only be what you allow it to be. If you want to conquer, you will first have to fight. If you want to love, you will first have to risk rejection. If you want to grow and learn, you will have to be pruned and the bas stuff cut away. Are you getting my drift? I have learned that a life worth living is the one that is taking chances and living in the unknown. It is amazing how much you can learn and grow in a short period of time when you just give up a little control.

I was accepted to be a part of Intercordia Canada this summer. My passion has always been for Africa, for reasons that I can’t explain. So logically, when I was picked my top four places to go for the summer they were 1) Ghana 2) Nicaragua 3) Ukraine 4) Ecuador. I was very surprised when I found out I would be going to Ecuador. However, I was surprisingly okay with it. I accepted it and knew that there was a reason for it. Also, I was excited to see a new part of the world and build relationships with Ecuadorians. I began my fundraising and was moving ahead with my planning. I woke up Friday morning to my phone ringing. I was surprised to hear that it was our coordinator from Intercordia. She has ‘good news’ for me. I was very confused and figured it had to do with my funds. So, my jaw dropped when she said “Kara, we want you to reconsider your placement for the summer. There is a new placement off the coast of Ghana and we want you to go.” To be honest I was not excited when she asked me this. I was torn. Yes, Ghana was my first choice originally, but I had grown to be excited about going to Ecuador. After a conversation with my dad and some time to think my answer was a very clear YES, I will go to Ghana. Seriously, words can’t do justice how it feels to be going home to Africa. Life has a weird and amazing way of surprising me. I have grown and learned so much from this experience already and I would not want to change the way that things have worked out lately.

Okay, onto Aquinas learning. . .

I am very happy that the inquiry groups have been chosen and the inquires have begun. The process was an interesting one though and I have learned quite a bit. When were asked to compile our world within our feasibility groups and present it to the class I was a little nervous because of how little I really knew about Tiananmen Square. However, I realised that all of the groups are in a similar place of not knowing much about their events and that will be the point of the inquiry. Being organized and professional is so important when presenting and researching an idea. Creating an annotated bibliography is something that I have never done in completion before so even the compilation of our sources taught me a lot. Also, Russ gave our group guidance with how to make our feasibility report be more professional and academic. It was too bad that some of the groups did not have the chance to present at all or with all of the group members. I think that a few of the events could have been feasible and made good inquires. However, I guess that is just the way it is and I did not feel comfortable vouching for an event to go forward when I knew so little about it.

I guess that is all for now. My entries seem to be getting more and more scattered and random, but so has my life.

Chin up! Kara

Let's Start a Revolution

How is it that unity and equality within humanity is so important to me, but I catch myself making contradictory statements so much? I have a mindset that I want to see all humans given the same chances and treated with dignity and equality. Yet, when it comes down to it, my brain is almost engraved with ideas of superiority. As a North American, it is so easy to consider myself on a higher level than someone living in a less wealthy country. This bothers me so much. Yes, I am very privileged to have been born in Canada and live with such peace and opportunities constantly being presented. However, I really don’t think that me living here has a whole lot of significance or importance unless I am using all that I have been given to help make the world a better place. I really am not meaning to sound clichéd or even cheesy. This is something though that I am learning a lot about and I want to make a more conscious decision to not speak as if I am superior to a prostitute in Thailand or a farmer in Ecuador. I am the opposite and I think I am the one who needs to be learning from them. I guess it all kind of comes back to how people come to believe what they do. I am still trying to figure it all out.

The Tiananmen Square Protests of 1989 is something that until last week I had no understanding of and I still have a long way to go. People’s choice of democracy over communism, and vice versa, has always intrigued me a little bit. I think you can learn a great deal about people’s beliefs when you begin to examine their choice to live in a democratic or communist society. The people of Beijing were under a communist government and many students, intellectuals and other citizens were getting tired of this way of living. The old saying ‘if you don’t like where the parade is going then get out and lead it’ was the mind set of many of the Chinese people who were seeking change, who wanted a revolution if you will. In a land that is so different than mine it can be easy to take sides, but I have to really step back and remember the centuries of traditions and values that are instilled in these people. A revolution and a defiance of the government could not remain a peaceful undertaking. It would mean violence and death for some. This did not deter many of the protesters. If anything, I think that it made them stronger. The one aspect of this that really caught me off guard was the naivety that so many of the protesters held. When the army and police force began to create a resistance many of the protesters did not get scared away by them. It was as though they did not believe that fellow citizens could actually injure and kill them. They did though. There are so many levels of how people come to believe what they do entwined in this story. I guess that is why I think it would make such a great inquiry. There are beliefs that have been accepted and practiced for centuries, but then challenged by a group of people seeking change. The protesters know that they are fighting for a good cause and therefore no one would oppose them. Right? The government’s strong belief in communism resulted in the validation of several thousand murders.

As I was doing the feasibility test for the Tiananmen Square Protests I looked quite a bit for books and other sources that would be useful to further my research. I have definitely improved in how I go about searching for resources and I am more comfortable with the process. As our professors were looking over the work that our group had brought in I realized that there is still a lot that I need to learn. The presentation and the set up of a bibliography is very important to the overall report. The more precise and accurate the references can be listed, cited, organized and so on will really add to the feasibility of the event. This is the main aspect of the report that I needed to improve on. Citing a list of books is no good unless I can explain (or offer a cited explanation) of why the resource would be useful. An annotated bibliography is something that I have never had to really complete before. So during this process I really have learned a lot. I am working on choosing resources that will sustain an inquiry and not simply make my bibliography look bigger and better. That is not the point at all.

I feel a song coming on!

So, we are all back together now. To be honest, I think that I was dreading it. I mean I was getting into a flow with all of our disciplines being taught separately. Not to mention, I was a little hesitant to begin another inquiry. Last semester scared me a little I guess. However, I have learned during Truth and Society so far that if there are two things needed to succeed in the class you need a little optimism and some trust in the professors. They have been teaching this class for many years and they have experience. So, I am trusting the direction that they are leading us in, but I am also being a lot more open to asking questions and questioning the process and decision making.

I realized today that Aquinas and I are made for one another. I really feel like being in this learning environment is helping me thrive as a student. And I am NOT saying this to gain an extra tick or brownie points. I am genuinely so appreciative of the class structure and the huge emphasis there is on learning. Most other classes that I am on or that I have been in are not geared towards to a student’s learning that will last a lifetime. I am finding though that this mindset can be carried over into my other classes as long as I put my mind to it. I need to make a conscious decision to learn. When I am sitting in Sociology class I find myself hoping that the fire alarm will go off or that our prof will decide to end class early. Not all classes are going to be mind boggling interesting and demand all of my attention. It’s all about my mindset though. I mean if I am finding something (ie. Sociology class) boring maybe all I need to do is change the way that I am looking at the situation and the circumstances. I remember Thom talking about this in September and I thought he was crazy. If something is boring, it’s boring. Case closed. Apparently I am slow though, because once I began putting this into practice I was surprised to see how much I was learning and how much of the ‘boring’ on information is actually very helpful. So bring on the Soc classes!!

I am kind of jumping all over the place as I write, but that’s just the way I roll.

Have you ever realized that there is something that you really love, but you are scared of it or you can’t express the love (I am not talking in code)? For me that ‘something’ is music. It isn’t a shallow appreciation for the newest Jack Johnson CD. It’s this inner part of me that allows me to find a connection with the world. I know I am the cheesiest person ever invented. I just think that music (of all types, sounds, genres, and generations) tells so many stories and it represents people and their beliefs and opinions. Writing music is something that I have been doing for a while and then I stopped. Now, I need to start again, but for some reason I am scared to try. I don’t write to be heard. I write to understand myself most of the time and maybe someday, somewhere what I write will find meaning in someone else’s life.

As we have been searching for events that are worthy of a feasibility test I have been slightly overwhelmed I guess. I felt a certain amount of pressure to find ‘good’ events for the class to choose and look into. I am so dumb. Every time I try to please someone I end up screwing things up and this is what I did this time. I found an event about the celibacy in the Catholic Church in the Twelfth Century. I know, you are probably yawning already. I was trying to pick an event that sounded academic and challenging. I am pretty sure that it was a fail though. So, as I was searching for a new event I just looked for something that explored/presented several belief points and an event that was new to me. Again, learning is not about looking good or sounding good all of the time. Most of the time it’s just me exploring topics that I have never looked into an ddiscovery so many new things.

I guess that is all for now. Sorry for the jumbled-ness and confusion. I have a feeling as we begin our feasibility tests that I will learn so much.

Cheers! kc